I just finished reading a novel that is very special to me...there will be more books to come, I'm sure.. I hope..for the characters are very dear to me.
Tonight, I watched a movie that was very profound. In it, over great time there was a friendship & love-- and it didn't seem like it would have a happy ending- yet it did. I've been thinking over them both and had some big revelations..maybe not..I think I have come to the same conclusions once again..but they merit being put into words. The story of life will not have just a happy ending or a sad one..because it all depends on where you stop... and what you focus on.
The cards that we are dealt in life- and the cards we choose to fold on- or play on.. determine our path. Life has brought me struggles, laughter, disappointment, joy, and this last year I've found who I am- and been brave enough to show 'her'. I've learned that I am acceptable- even lovable. Through that revelation, I've learned that I can stand on my own- and nurture relationships that are good for me. I've seen changes for the better in those I love around me-- in reaction to my choices. While I may yearn for the quiet soul..to relax.. to just 'be'.. that isn't in my hand of cards yet. When I have those peaceful moments with someone.. they are cherished even more..
We can not know for certain what the hands we play or the cards we are dealt will bring- but we know we must play them to the fullest. For if we do not- we have done a disservice to being given the choice....
Our children will be here with us for a time- and we must do our best to cherish and guide them the best we can- while we are able. When I hold my daughter, like I did the other night and she cries in my arms- or when I tease her and make her laugh--or explain some things in life.. I'm so deeply grateful for where I am. Memories and love is the greatest gift we can give to anyone. Our spouse is who we have been joined to, we must devote ourselves to the fullest we are able. Our friends we must be here for- through the battles of life. Our enemies we must show integrity and character to- for that is what sets us apart from them. Those less fortunate than us- we must try to help- for it is oftentimes through us that there is hope shown. To 'life' we owe these things.. for those of us that have seen death and lost loved ones- it's a disrespect we show if we choose to not do these things.
I don't know when my time will be up.. I don't want to know. I still have dreams - and whether they become a reality or not- time will tell... I'm unique. If I believe ..I will do everything in my power... my goals are to show those in my life understanding, devotion and caring. I hope those that love me will do the same... I have many flaws... and will continue trying to improve on them...I will be true...to life.
